A Plain and Simple Series, #36

Borg Breasts

(Cronan Thompson)


FIRST OFFICER'S LOG

        Let's say there are 4,000,000,000,000 female Borg drones (a
conservative figure considering he number of solar systems and ships)..
The excess material required to form the interesting metal bustier would
be greater than the mass of the Enterprise D given in the tech manual.
        This coupled with the fact that simply cutting them off would
reduce the number calories need for each borg makes them unnessecary.
Not that their not nice to look at but.... Male testes, OTOH....
        They are more than likely removed simply because the purpose of
the scrotum is to keep the testes cool. Borg outfits just don't have the
room.  If, for some unknown reason, Borg human drone testicles are
intact they are effectively useless due to their prolonged postion.
Unless of course the suits have a way of transfering the heat. This
would seem to be explain the higher temperature and humidty on a Borg
ship. This could all be remedied if the Borg allows the breasts and
testicles to hang free effectively securing a whole new audience for ST
in particular and UPN in general....
        Of course I could be on the track.......

Capt. Cronan Thompson
gpgod@mindspring.com
Sanity and comprehension are all
too often contradictory conditions.


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